Comic horoscope table for the company of friends in prose and poetry, pictures

To amuse guests, you can organize interesting quizzes and contests. And besides, amuse guests with comic horoscopes.

The joke Horoscope for the company of friends in verses and prose will appeal to all your guests.

Aries: comic horoscope in verses and prose

• Aries, as before, does not give up and defends his opinion to the last. Even if he is wrong, imposing his opinion is a matter of principle.
• Confident Aries will be able to overshadow any standard of beauty with their appearance. The trend of the season is a lot of curls and polished hooves.
• The educated sheep will once again be surprised by their straightforwardness. The shortcomings of the interlocutor will be masterfully voiced at the first opportunity.
• Want to relax unforgettably? Then take a reckless Aries with you. You can’t find the best adventurer.
• Want to train the psyche - then twist an affair with the woman Aries. You are waiting for the fireworks of emotions and shocks.

Comic horoscope to a man and a woman in verses and prose

• Taurus is a second variety of a ram. He always puts on the mask of nonsense on himself. The homemade shelter of Taurus resembles a museum - so many incomprehensible, but very necessary things, you have not seen yet.
• Skillful imitators of other people's successes. Today is an artist in front of you, tomorrow is a diplomat. In inviting to visit Veselchak you can suddenly spend an evening with a bore-philosopher.
• For the woman of Taurus, the whole world is imperfect, except for her family. Do not know what to do - ask the Taurus woman, only she knows how to correctly. In family life with a woman, there is always a place for broken dishes, flying pillows and thematic tantrums.
• Taurus can always count on double benefits. Agreeing to one salary, he necessarily earns on the second. Taurus knows how to sell more expensive, pay cheaper, eat more. There is always a sandwich in his bag, the stitch has a tidy amount and a spare option in the head.
• It is impossible to strain Taurus, he always has a thousand original reasons. For his inventions, he has more than once to get a face.

Comic horoscope in verses and prose for twins of men and women

• Optimism of this sign can be envied. Any failure throws a new idea to the twins in the head. This sign knows how to sew a little, dance a little, sing a little and participate in any useless undertakings. An ideal career for twins is housekeeping.
• If you want 3 days to go unnoticed - start a conversation with a twin. You have not heard so many incoherent words and confusing thoughts.
• A twin man, like no one knows how to beautifully confess love to a womanAt the same time, after half an hour he will easily spin an affair with a new girlfriend, and after a couple of days he will forget about the first and the second.
• Gemini is difficult to make a decision - If one half strives forward, then the second from the principle will pull back. When sending the twin to the store for sweet to be ready to eat for dinner Solny.
• Inviting the twins to the holiday, you can count on idiocy fun and unpredictable impromptu.

Comic horoscope in verses and prose for cancer of men and women

• It is very important for everyone to please everyone. Crayfish always adhere to generally accepted rules, but in their heads they have complete do not care. Marrying For an approximate cancer raised girl, be prepared to get a whisper girl in your wife.
• Cancer always manages to mislead. It will not be difficult for him to poke an unnecessary thing for you and promise from three boxes.
• To pick up cancer to a man of a companion, you need to arrange a whole casting. They always tune in to a happy ending, but at the last moment they run away from their own wedding.
• Crayfish like no other believe in the end of the world, parallel worlds and a pair of normal phenomena. Any incomprehensible news evokes a tantrum and an irresistible desire to “do something” in cancer.
• I do not advise you to drink with cancer. Otherwise, the meeting will turn into a prolonged evening of philosophy. If you want to hunger cancer-offer him something yesterday, or someone bitten by someone.

Comic horoscope in verses and prose for Leo men and women

• A sign with an unshakable faith in oneself and his unsurpassedness. They need praise as a bonus for a salary, go additive for a delicious dinner. They are ready to give the last T -shirt for sweet flattery. The case when the whole page is in social. networks consists of own selfies.
• The lions are not shy about ridiculing themselves, but at the same time they will not forget to “elegantly cheat” others. We are ready to spend all the money to surprise the gifts of others. You can’t forbid living beautifully, so the lions are ready to pump their savings in one evening. Do not know how to spend money beautifully - Leo will easily teach you.
• Always supports meaningless conversations, which is very similar to the sign of Gemini. Leo is always trying to avoid conflicts, but as a result he becomes the main participant in all alterations.
• In relations with a partner, Lions always want to hear "I obey and obey." He considers himself a “valuable” copy and is not ready to follow someone on the occasion.

Comic horoscope in verses and prose for the Virgin Men and Women

• The case when the order is above all. If you made a mess in the apartment of the Virgin, then know that in her head you are no longer among the living.
• In any incomprehensible situation with Virgo, the second side is always to blame. Virgin Master for the translation of the shooter.
• In the work, the Virgin is aimed primarily at the result, and only then at the financial reward. Ready to dig the field for 3 kopecks, if only it was beautiful and neat.
• In relations with the partner of the Virgo, they talk a lot and do little. In the family of Virgo, everything should be on schedule, so the refrigerator after 7 is tied with a chain. He quickly notices any little things, so it will not be possible to hide the papers behind the sofa.
• Virgin always acts on the principle of “measure 7 times, cut off some,” therefore always among the late.

Comic horoscope in verses and prose for the weights of men and women

• Charming and mysterious sign. It is very important for weights to look fashionable and stylish, so their extraordinary bows will always be an example for others. The jacket is inside out or a coat of two sizes - this is not a mistake, but part of their image.
• Libra knows how to organize thematic parties, while they must think about everything to the smallest detail. Having treated you with dinner, the scales will tell in detail the recipe for the dish, and with enthusiasm they will describe the cooking process.
• The scales are very loving and easily “circle around the finger” several partners at the same time. Behind the delicate and vulnerable way, a person "easily enduring the brain" is hidden.
• The artistry of the scales knows no boundaries, they crave applause and recognition. Even in complete solitude, the scales will continue to play their role.
• It is almost impossible to find out secrets from the scales. You will quickly hear another fairy tale than the true state of affairs.

Comic horoscope in verses and prose for Scorpio men and women

• Scorpions are great dreamers and inventors. Their grandiose plans will remain in their heads, and stone walls and impassable jungle await them in reality.
• A sign that loves abundance, but will not forget to spy how much gifts from friends cost. They answer good, evil is not forgiven. The possibility of stepping on a sick corn or pepper pepper in a dish will not be missed.
• Scorpions are supporters of a large family, so they are always in a hurry to satisfy their needs for the most extraordinary places. Hear the sounds through the wall - do not doubt that this is a temperamental scorpion. In the future, they have to get many awards for sexuality.
• Scorpio does not know how to control his rage, Therefore, if you do not want to become his fighting pear, just keep silent.

Comic horoscope in verses and prose for Sagittarius men and women

• This sign has the most unstable financial situation. Today he will climb the mountain like a climbing, tomorrow like a ball rolls down. The stocking sign will not forget to “shoot” a cigarette or ask for an additive.
• Sagittarius love to talk about high, compose fables and memoirs on the go. An interesting audience will always spin around them. For inappropriate honesty and straightforwardness, more than one bruise will have to be disguised.
• The Sagittarius woman is ready to wrap herself in gift packaging and present to the man, Therefore, in the near future, the number of partners will grow up as a dollar.
• The Sagittarius man will conquer many more female hearts until the heartburn is falling into his hands. He will always find a shelter where he will be heated and regret.

Comic horoscope in verses and prose for Capricorn men and women

• Capricorns are always puzzled by incomprehensible things. The list of their plans will not fit into any notebook. Capricorn should be 48 hours on the day.
• To get rid of Capricorn forever, it is enough to offend him once. For a tasteless borsch woman Capricorn is ready to divorce her husband. Marrying the Capricorn man, be prepared for fires of emotions and fountains of passions.
• In love they will be persecuted by constant doubts. According to Capricorn’s life scenario, you can safely write new Santa Barbara series.
• Capricorns will always be able to achieve the goal thanks to skillful whining and masterfully clouding the mind. If you live too much, then Capricorn will complicate your everyday life free of charge.

Comic horoscope in verses and prose for Aquarius men and women

• Aquarius love to pour from empty to empty. Masters of conversations on any topic. Despite the “collapsed” look “with an oak” possess attractive charm. They will always be surrounded by an interesting company.
• Aquarius live one day. The salary is spent in one day, on the principle of "walk like that." For the sake of pleasure, they are ready to break the law.
• Woman Aquarius belongs to the category of ladies who "will stop the horse and will enter the burning hut." They love to give out strange tips that are surprisingly also work.
• Men Aquarius are beautiful lovers, Therefore, they will always be surrounded by beautiful ladies. Aquarius prefer a minimum of clothes on the body, so going to the beach with him, be prepared to be in the company of nudists.

Comic horoscope in verses and prose for fish men and women

• The slowest sign of the horoscope. Pisces live on the principle "And let the whole world wait". Fish always create traffic jams and queues.
• The fish are very secretive. Others can only guess what they have on their minds. But even in this silence they manage to turn a simple process into a mega event. For example, clean Thursday can end with a flood, and a picnic with a fire.
• Women are always shine like scales. Thanks to their intuition, they will be able to get interesting work, a rich partner and a profitable offer. On their table will always be black and red caviar.
• Pisces are always ready to sacrifice themselves, so they have to degenerate several dozen times.

Comic horoscope for all zodiac signs in pictures

The comic horoscope is a table for the company of friends: how do they drink the signs of the zodiac?

Do not know how to cheer the guests at the holiday? We offer a joke horoscope table. By the way, we will tell you about how they drink signs of the zodiac. And at the table we will check it.

Interesting articles on the site:

• Hand intuition line
• Fate line on the arm
• Daily and night -item and night.
• Hand line on the arm
• Hand Traveling Line
• What do lines on the left hand mean
• Inheritance line in the palm of the hand
• True fortune -telling for monthly

Video: Caced Horoscope for Women